gemma hiles

GEMMA HILES free subscription click here

Post Reply 
 
Thread Rating:
  • 18 Vote(s) - 3.11 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5

Do you have a zombie plan...?

Author Message
Mister Gummidge Offline
Professional Strawman
*****

Posts: 2,226
Joined: Sep 2008
Reputation: 131
Post: #11
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
Bosse Wrote:The surest way for you to be safe from Zombie attacks is to simply not shower or bath, that way the zombies will not attack you and treat you as one of their own.

Of course that has it's down-side in a world where possible zombie attacks are laughed at by the unprepared, so instead I shower daily and have spent some time working on an invisibility potion, up to now though my efforts have been largely unsuccessful, they merely just have the ability to get me completely drunk, although I will persevere not just for the good of myself but for the good of all.

Perseverance is a quality to be admired (and a very good song by Terrorvision) and I hope it works out for you... Besides, if you drink enough of it, you'll at least be invisible in a social sense (night buses, shopping centres, parks etc.) so that can be considered a partial success. The only slight hiccup is convincing the hordes of shambling, flesh-eating corpses to ignore you as well. What would embarass a zombie...? Keep working Bosse, our thoughts are with you!

JohnnyChrist Wrote:i would just lock myself in my room with a loaded gun, a bottle of scotch, a cuban cigar and lots of tissues. and wen they come a bangin i shall light the cigar, cock my gun, and....................have a goodbye world wank.

If you plan on blowing your brains out afterwards, why bother with the tissues?Big Grin

"You say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. I say that I tailor my jokes to the audience..."
07-02-2009 22:16
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
A Spider Monkey Offline
7th Level Invisible Ninja
****

Posts: 787
Joined: Sep 2008
Reputation: 32
Post: #12
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
mr gummidge Wrote:A Spider Monkey, A man with a solid plan and able to keep a secret, I can respect that...

Another bonus, I think I've just devised a way to make a crossbow type device out of an old mattress and a wardrobe.

The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to arm bears

"a clunge like a burst bean bag"
07-02-2009 22:18
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
JohnnyChrist Offline
I Can Feel Everything!!
****

Posts: 593
Joined: Nov 2008
Reputation: 19
Post: #13
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
mr gummidge Wrote:
Bosse Wrote:The surest way for you to be safe from Zombie attacks is to simply not shower or bath, that way the zombies will not attack you and treat you as one of their own.

Of course that has it's down-side in a world where possible zombie attacks are laughed at by the unprepared, so instead I shower daily and have spent some time working on an invisibility potion, up to now though my efforts have been largely unsuccessful, they merely just have the ability to get me completely drunk, although I will persevere not just for the good of myself but for the good of all.

Perseverance is a quality to be admired (and a very good song by Terrorvision) and I hope it works out for you... Besides, if you drink enough of it, you'll at least be invisible in a social sense (night buses, shopping centres, parks etc.) so that can be considered a partial success. The only slight hiccup is convincing the hordes of shambling, flesh-eating corpses to ignore you as well. What would embarass a zombie...? Keep working Bosse, our thoughts are with you!

JohnnyChrist Wrote:i would just lock myself in my room with a loaded gun, a bottle of scotch, a cuban cigar and lots of tissues. and wen they come a bangin i shall light the cigar, cock my gun, and....................have a goodbye world wank.

If you plan on blowing your brains out afterwards, why bother with the tissues?Big Grin

no no no lol the wank is just to get me feeling sexually unstressed b4 i die, after i do it i clean up, kick the door open and blow sum zombie ass up. then wen i run out of bullets ..................my plan runs out here lol

Come back - to the days when we were young
Come back - to the days when nothing mattered.
I have to return some videotapes....

I need to engage in homicidal behaviour on a massive scale can not be corrected but, uh, I have no other way to fulfill my needs.
07-02-2009 22:22
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
Bosse Offline
*$Magik<Redneck>$*
***

Posts: 287
Joined: Oct 2008
Reputation: 16
Post: #14
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
The simple answer is to just build a house in the middle of the Ocean tbh with a pipe leading to the Russian Petroleum station and a Lire Jet for holidays to Bonaire.
07-02-2009 22:24
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
A Spider Monkey Offline
7th Level Invisible Ninja
****

Posts: 787
Joined: Sep 2008
Reputation: 32
Post: #15
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
JohnnyChrist Wrote:no no no lol the wank is just to get me feeling sexually unstressed b4 i die, after i do it i clean up, kick the door open and blow sum zombie ass up. then wen i run out of bullets ..................my plan runs out here lol

When you run out of bullets always remember to throw the gun at the zombie. You might get a lucky shot to the head with enough force to create some space to get away.

The right to bear arms is slightly less ludicrous than the right to arm bears

"a clunge like a burst bean bag"
07-02-2009 22:24
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
Mister Gummidge Offline
Professional Strawman
*****

Posts: 2,226
Joined: Sep 2008
Reputation: 131
Post: #16
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
A Spider Monkey Wrote:Another bonus, I think I've just devised a way to make a crossbow type device out of an old mattress and a wardrobe.

If you ever test it out, put the results on youtube... Unless it involves throwing the wardrobe at the matress and then ducking, that probably won't work very well, except as a way of tenderising your meat for the zombiesBig Grin

"You say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. I say that I tailor my jokes to the audience..."
07-02-2009 22:26
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
jordo Offline
L.F.C
****

Posts: 728
Joined: Sep 2008
Reputation: 59
Post: #17
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
I've had a long hard think about this.

I reckon I would take the 'Hell for Leather' approach. Get some tools, a fast car, plenty of food, water and ammo and go nuts. I don't know how far I'd get but I bet I'd have fun doing it Smile

PS. Quality thread.
07-02-2009 22:31
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
Mister Gummidge Offline
Professional Strawman
*****

Posts: 2,226
Joined: Sep 2008
Reputation: 131
Post: #18
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
@ jordo: Getting the guns is always the problem in this country. The yanks, canadians and swiss are ok, but any country with sensible gun control is in deep trouble when the dead awaken... Maybe one of those replica Samurai swords is a better option?

"You say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. I say that I tailor my jokes to the audience..."
07-02-2009 22:37
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
jordo Offline
L.F.C
****

Posts: 728
Joined: Sep 2008
Reputation: 59
Post: #19
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
Haha, I think you'll notice if you read again. I said "tools" not guns Tongue
I think I'll be ok with some sharp stuff.
07-02-2009 22:40
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
JohnnyChrist Offline
I Can Feel Everything!!
****

Posts: 593
Joined: Nov 2008
Reputation: 19
Post: #20
RE: Do you have a zombie plan...?
A Spider Monkey Wrote:
JohnnyChrist Wrote:no no no lol the wank is just to get me feeling sexually unstressed b4 i die, after i do it i clean up, kick the door open and blow sum zombie ass up. then wen i run out of bullets ..................my plan runs out here lol

When you run out of bullets always remember to throw the gun at the zombie. You might get a lucky shot to the head with enough force to create some space to get away.


damn spider monkey that is quality shit, good idea, i shall add it to my escape plan thing.

i wonder why no one ever trys to bite the Zombie before it bites you? this could be the secret cure?

Come back - to the days when we were young
Come back - to the days when nothing mattered.
I have to return some videotapes....

I need to engage in homicidal behaviour on a massive scale can not be corrected but, uh, I have no other way to fulfill my needs.
07-02-2009 22:43
Find all posts by this user Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply 



GEMMA HILES free subscription click here

gemma hiles