Funny News Stories

World famous imam with haemorrhoids exposes himself in Bristol park....

...and he calls it "Lexie"!!

http://www.themorningstarr.co.uk/2010/09...stol-park/

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/06/30/world/...?ref=world

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/06/30/sports...ef=general

My kind of guy.



http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-14135523

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-14131133


Not really funny,but will have you squirming.!

I can just hear the Queen now,saying "We are not amused"


http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programmes/fr...538059.stm

A 57-year-old bus driver was sent forward for trial today charged with buggery with an animal. Sean McDonnell, 18 Rathmore, Churchill Meadows, Raheen, Limerick, is charged with buggery with an animal, namely a German Shepherd dog, at Laurel Park, Patrickswell, Co Limerick, on October 7th, 2008, contrary to Section 61 of the Offences Against the Person Act. Mr McDonnell appeared before Limerick District Court today where he was served with the book of evidence in the case. Det Sgt Paraig O'Dywer gave evidence of serving the book on the accused.

Insp Jerry Horan told the court the Director of Public Prosecutions had consented for Mr McDonnell to be sent forward for trial to the next sitting of Limerick Circuit Criminal Court in September. Dressed in a dark grey suit and red tie the accused man sat in court accompanied by his daughter for the brief hearing. He was granted free legal aid to cover the cost of his solicitor Ted McCarthy plus two counsel. Judge Eamon O'Brien, issued the alibi warning which means the accused must give the State 14 days notice of any alibi witnesses he intends calling. Mr McDonnell was remanded on continuing bail' - The Irish Times.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-14175993


Not my idea of getting a Buzz.

(14-07-2011 09:09 )bombshell Wrote:  http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-14131133


Not really funny,but will have you squirming.!

I saw that one in the paper... The headline was "Mrs Becker chops hubby's pecker"

(17-07-2011 14:24 )iamthatjack Wrote:  A 57-year-old bus driver was sent forward for trial today charged with buggery with an animal. Sean McDonnell, 18 Rathmore, Churchill Meadows, Raheen, Limerick, is charged with buggery with an animal, namely a German Shepherd dog, at Laurel Park, Patrickswell, Co Limerick, on October 7th, 2008, contrary to Section 61 of the Offences Against the Person Act. Mr McDonnell appeared before Limerick District Court today where he was served with the book of evidence in the case. Det Sgt Paraig O'Dywer gave evidence of serving the book on the accused.

Insp Jerry Horan told the court the Director of Public Prosecutions had consented for Mr McDonnell to be sent forward for trial to the next sitting of Limerick Circuit Criminal Court in September. Dressed in a dark grey suit and red tie the accused man sat in court accompanied by his daughter for the brief hearing. He was granted free legal aid to cover the cost of his solicitor Ted McCarthy plus two counsel. Judge Eamon O'Brien, issued the alibi warning which means the accused must give the State 14 days notice of any alibi witnesses he intends calling. Mr McDonnell was remanded on continuing bail' - The Irish Times.

Seems they have their own version of Dogging in Limerick

'Heavily pregnant Emma Veness sought medical advice after taking a real shine to furniture polish. The unusual craving means the mother-of-one has developed an urge to eat it two or three times a day and she's already polished off three cans. "I can't explain why I like it, I think it has a lot do with the texture and how it feels in my mouth," said the 26-year-old. "I normally spray a bit on my fingers and lick it off or spray a bit on the duster and suck it." Not surprisingly, her partner, bricklayer Gavin Wallis, 27, isn't too keen on her dirty habit. She said: "I'd be polishing the TV and turn my back to him to have a taste. When he found out he wasn't happy."

'Otherwise Ms Veness has a squeaky-clean lifestyle - she doesn't smoke and rarely drinks. But her doctor confirmed that the teaching assistant, from Sutton Coldfield, Birmingham, suffers from an eating disorder called Pica - an urge to eat things that aren't food. Ms Veness even developed a favourite: "I've tried all the brands but Asda Smart Price polish is the one that does it for me. Others are all too perfumed. Certain things make me crave it more, like simply talking about it or when adverts for polish come on the telly. I wish someone could help me stop. I don't want to be eating it in my 50s" - Metro.

If you got beyond "how it feels in my mouth" without laughing, you're more mature than me