Favourite TV & Film Quotes & Dialogue

"why dont you put her in charge!!!" aliens 2
and of course jules's "i am the rath" speach b4 he shoot's some 1...
infact theres so many in pulp fiction, which to me is modern day Shakespeare...

More from Scrubs.

Dr. Kelso: This Friday, I am receiving an award from the A.M.A...
Dr. Cox: Jerk-Off of the Year. No, Bastard of the Year! Uh, don't you tell me! Guy I Despise So Much, I'd Pay Someone To Kill Ya and Stuff Ya and Leave you by my Bed, So That When I Wake Up in the Morning, I Could Roll Over and Punch You in the Face... of the Year.

from austin powers: international man of mystery

"allow myself to introduce... myself"

From Spaced

Tim (on phone): "Where are you?"
Mike: "Sheffield."
Tim :What are you doing in Sheffield?"
Mike: "I fell asleep on the tube."
Tim: "The tube doesn't go to Sheffield."
Mike: "Yeah, I must have changed at Kings Cross."

Jaws

Quint: They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, Chief, sharks come cruisin' so we formed ourselves into tight groups. Kinda like old squares in the battle of Waterloo- the idea was the shark comes to the nearest man and then he starts poundin; hollerin' and screamin'. Sometimes the shark would go away....but sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that, shark, he looks right into you, right into your eye. You Know, a thing about a shark, he's got lifeless eyes, black eyes, like dolls eyes, when he comes at you. he doesn't seem to be livin'....until he bite you. Those black eyes eyes roll over white then....then your hear that terrible high-pitched screamin. The ocean turn red and in spite of the pounding and hollerin; they all come in. They rip you to pieces.

You know, by the end of the first dawn, we lost a hundred men. I don't know how many sharks. Maybe a thousand. I don't know how many men- the averaged six an hour. On Thursday morning, Chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson, from Cleveland; baseball player, bosun's mate. I thought he was asleep. He bobbed up and down in the water just like some kind of top- upened. Well, he'd been bitten in half, below the waist.
Noon the fifth day, a Lockheed Ventura saw us. He swung in low and he saw us. He was a young pilot - alot younger than Mr Hooper- well, he saw us and he came in low, and here hours later a big fat PBY comes down and starts to pick us up. That was the last time I was most frightened. Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a life jacket again.

So, eleven hundred men went into the water, 316 men came out. The sharks took the rest. June 29th 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

From The Shawshank Redemption

1967 Parole Hearings Man: Ellis Boyd Redding, your files say you've served 40 years of a life sentence. Do you feel you've been rehabilitated?
Red: Rehabilitated? Well, now let me see. You know, I don't have any idea what that means.
1967 Parole Hearings Man: Well, it means that you're ready to rejoin society...
Red: I know what *you* think it means, sonny. To me it's just a made up word. A politician's word, so young fellas like yourself can wear a suit and a tie, and have a job. What do you really want to know? Am I sorry for what I did?
1967 Parole Hearings Man: Well, are you?
Red: There's not a day goes by I don't feel regret. Not because I'm in here, or because you think I should. I look back on the way I was then: a young, stupid kid who committed that terrible crime. I want to talk to him. I want to try and talk some sense to him, tell him the way things are. But I can't. That kid's long gone and this old man is all that's left. I got to live with that. Rehabilitated? It's just a bullshit word. So you go on and stamp your form, sonny, and stop wasting my time. Because to tell you the truth, I don't give a shit.

Phil Dunphy - Modern Family.

Phil Dunphy: I am brave. Roller coasters? Love 'em. Scary movies? I've seen Ghostbusters like 7 times. I regularly drive through neighborhoods that have only recently been gentrified. So yeah I am pretty much not afraid of anything.
Cameron Tucker: [Cut to Cameron entering dressed as Fizbo the clown] Well hey hey hey hey everybody! Quit your clowning around, that's my job!
Phil Dunphy: Except clowns. Never shared that with the 'fam, so shhh! I do have an image to maintain. I am not really sure where the fear comes from, my mother says it's cause when I was a kid I found a dead clown in the woods. But who knows?
_

Phil Dunphy: In nature, fathers are known to eat their young. Is it because they're delicious? No. It's because they want to give their female... bear, giraffe, what have you... the honeymoon they never had. Just to be clear: I don't condone eating your kids, although I sure as heck know why giraffes do it.
_

Phil Dunphy: If you show enough houses, you learn all the tricks. Every realtor is just a ninja with a blazer. The average burglar breaks in and leaves clues everywhere, but not me. I'm completely clueless.
_

Phil Dunphy: "Sorry guys, I can't be in Vegas because my wife's having a breakdown." Believe me, you don't want to make that call to a bunch of former male cheerleaders. They will mock you with a hurtful rhythmic chant.
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Phil Dunphy: So Laura's trying to test me? Bring it on. I've been tested my entire life. They could never find anything.
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Modern Family

Phil: "The Blind Side, that's the film about the black kid who plays tight end."
Alex: "Offensive line, Dad."
Phil: "Sorry, the coloured kid."