Life Quotes (Famous or non Famous)

"I love the smell of pussy in the morning" CW Pussylover.

"You come out of a woman and you spend the rest of your life trying to get back inside." Heathcote Williams

"Samantha has to go now as she's off to meet her Italian gentleman friend who's taking her out for an ice cream. She says she likes nothing better than to spend the evening licking the nuts off a large Neopolitan."

Humphrey Lyttelton (I'm Sorry I haven't a Clue BBC Radio 4)

"Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously." Woody Allen

"This bowler's like my dog: Three short legs and balls that swing each way" Brian Johnston

"The popular game Twister: I like to describe it as sex with none of the enjoyable bits, except of course, during sex my face isn't quite as close to my mother's arse." Ben Davis

"Women have created a mystique around their pleasure zones, (hence the invention in the 1960s of the G-spot, the clitoris and multiple orgasms) so that now each time a man has sex he feels like he's stumbled pissed into the cockpit of a Harrier jump jet."

Michael Bradley

"Samantha has had to nip off to the National Opera, where she's been giving private tuition to the singers. Having seen what she did to the baritone, the director is keen to see what she might do for a tenor."

Humphrey Lyttleton I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue BBC Radio 4

"Going out with a girl is like entering a new town. Either you get lucky and go straight onto the next or you get unlucky and end up on the ring road, heading for the industrial estate." Simon Nye