RE: Review of last night's show
(If this is too much off topic please let me know).
I had a visit from my friend Al the Alien from the planet Blarg. He wanted me to explain Babestation to him. Here we go then (me in quotes, Al with the colons).
"Hey Al, this is Babenation. Oh wow, you're in for a treat - it's Atlanta on first, looking hot in lemon coloured bra and pants."
: She's an interesting specimen of the Human female.
"She sure is. Look at how she drapes herself over the desk."
: That movement - what do you call that?
"F**king hot. Also, I guess it's a hip wiggle. Look, we're 15 minutes in and the bra is already off."
: Just what is the fascination with the female milk dispensers?
"Please Al, drop the technical talk, it's really off-putting. Boobs are just... Look, just watch them - see how they move."
: Now she's standing on the furniture - is that normal behaviour?
"If someone looks that good doing it, why not? Now she's put her hand down her pants - delicious."
: Do all humans bend that way?
"Well, we'd probably like to, but no. That's called the splits, for obvious reasons."
: Now both her legs are behind her ears - this is very interesting.
"You're right there. See how she's rubbing herself?"
: But we can't see it.
"Yeah, well, that's the rule, you just have to imagine what's going on - or get your credit card out. She's making good use of that chair, sitting astride it like that."
: They should employ her to sell such furniture.
"Definitely. The pants are off now - she's completely naked, kneeling on the desk. Ooh, did you see that? That was an accidental flash."
: Is that important?
"You bet - we live for those moments. Anyway, she's off now and Lynda's taking over.
: Ah, one of your older specimens.
"Al, that's rude - you're not supposed to talk about a lady's age. But you're right."
: She isn't moving like the last one.
"True, but there are different ways to do a performance. See how she's using the denim jacket to play peekaboo with her boobs?"
: They are huge!
"Well, yes. It's all about taste you see. Some guys like that, and the babes have the choice these days if they want to go bigger. See how she moves - it's less athletic than Atlanta but very seductive."
: So you're saying that it's about variety.
"Exactly. Now here's Alice to take over, in a very nice black bra and pants combo.
: She hasn't wasted any time removing them, it hardly seems worth the effort to put them on in the first place.
"I know - gotta love her for that. Oh this is interesting - she's going to do a POV."
: What's that?
"Point of view. A different angle on things."
: Ah, so she's going to talk about politics?
"No, a different camera view. See? We're looking up from between her legs."
: All that shaking - is that what human males do for reproduction?
"No, that's just the guy on the camera pretending to get involved."
: The show is a lot about that isn't it - pretending?
"Well yeah, sort of. It's really about permission though. We get to see at some nice looking girls and enjoy the fantasy, while they accept us doing that."
: I know, that was my interpretation when I tried it.
"Look, it isn't acceptable to stare at girls normally, so here it's... Wait, what?"
: When I wear my human female disguise to go in front of the camera, that was my impression.
"What? You mean... You are one of the babes on the channel?"
: Yes, of course. I needed to see both sides. Anyway, thank you but I have to return home now.
"So, which babe are you? Al?"
But it was too late, he (or she?) had already gone.
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