Simpson's Funnies

"Welcome to the electric car of the future, sponsored by the Gasoline Producers of America"



"Hello, I'm an electric car, i can't go very fast or very far and when you drive me, people will think your gay"



"One of us ! One of us !"

"You looking for a good time sailor ?"

"I certainly am"



"No your not !"

"Hi I'm Moe S"

"Hi Moe"

"Yeah so last night i was closing up the bar when some young punk comes in and tries to stick me up"

"Whatever did you do Moe ?"

"Well it could of been a real ugly situation but i managed to shoot him in the spine"



"Yeah !!" "Woo Woo !!"

"Yeah, ha ha, i guess the next place he robs better have a ramp. Ha ha"

"Ha ha ha ha ha"

"Mum what if there's a really bad crumby guy going to jail but i know he's innocent ?"

"Well Bart your Uncle Arthur used to have a saying. "Shoot em' all and let God sort it out." Unfortunately, one day he put his theory into practice. It took 75 federal marshals to bring him down. Now, let's never speak of him again."

"What if i can get this guy off the hook, should i do it?"

"Honey you should listen to your heart and not the voices in your head like a certain Uncle did one grey December morn."

"Aw, twenty dollars? I wanted a peanut!"

"Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts."

"Explain how!"

"Money can be exchanged for goods and services "

"WOOHOO !!"

"Well i don't think anyone in this family is capable of attempted murder"



"Ehhh, you never know what your capable of. I never thought i could shoot down a German plane but last year i proved myself wrong"

"We are now approaching our destination: Itchy and Scratchy Land the amusement park of the future where nothing can possib-lie go wrong.... possibly go wrong. Huh that's the first thing that's ever gone wrong."

"Alright I'm in charge here"

"Oh run along Quimby, I think they're dedicating a phone booth somewhere"

"Watch it you talking tub of donught batter"



"Hey i got pictures of you Quimby"



"You don't scare me that could be anyone's ass"

"Guess who's flat broke and picking up trash for a living?"



"Please be Flanders, Please be Flanders"

James Caan: "Hey, Bart, me and Mrs. Krabappel, uh, we're going to go play some "backgammon", if you know what I mean."

"I don't, but I hope you win"

"Oh, he's gonna win"

"Some guys like a challenge. Not me."