Funny Sayings And Quotes

"I shan't be taking my wife with me to paris.You don't take a sausage roll to a banquet"-Sir Winston Churchill.

"One day the don't knows will get in,and then where will we be?"-Spike Milligan.

"The quickest way to make a red light turn green is to try to find something in your glove box"-Billy Connolly.

"Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say My name is Bob amd i'm an alcoholic" - Peter Kay.

"I don't want to name players but Scott Parker and Matthew Upson recieved new contracts"-Alan Curbishly does a terrible job of not naming names.

"The ref might not have been in the way,but he's still in the way"-Paul Merson.

"If you are allowed to smack children,you should be allowed to smack geriatrics as well because they are just as much of a nuisance as children,if not more"-Jack Dee

"The keeper thought Robben was going to come inside him"-ITV's Jim Beglin turns the air blue.

Is there anybody with Irish in them? Is there any of the girls who'd like a little more Irish in them?
Phil Lynott introduction before thin lizzy would play emerald live.

"The eyes are the window into the soul,but also a tunnel into the vagina"-Russel Brand.