RE: Karina Currie
Karina Currie is obviously a lady of many talents, but what continuously strikes me about her is her high-level ability as a poet. She doesn't take five months to pen a verse which drives half the nation to suicide and makes the other half projectile-vomit. She simply talks, and it rhymes, and then you either laugh, or get the raging horn, or both. She's a genius! Therefore, I am setting forward a motion that Karina should be appointed as Poet Laureate, with immediate effect, on the basis of overwhelming public demand.
No disrespect to the current Poet Laureate. She's perfectly good, but she does say quite a number of things which don't actually rhyme, and therefore she's no match for the ever-lyrical Karina. So the only fair and proper course of action is for members of this forum to mobilise the ejaculation of the current Poet Laureate and establish the very gorgeous Karina in her place. The nation gets an exciting new artist, Karina gets the customary 650 bottles of sherry… She could drink it, have baths in it – both at the same time if she wants.
You may at this point be thinking: "Hang on, has this bloke lost it a bit upstairs? Won't Babestation get a bit boring with Karina flouncing around in the realm of high art?" Well, fear not, because I've thought this through, and I think you're gonna like it… As a government-endorsed poet, Karina will artistically legitimise any TV show in which she appears. In other words, Babestation will have to be officially reclassified as a serious art programme (I think). And since sex within the sphere of serious art is entirely proper and acceptable to all upstanding and responsible adults of the UK, Karina will be at full and unlimited liberty to dildo herself senseless, on Freeview, whenever the mood takes her. She could even do it on Partyland! I told you it was good!
So, finally, porn allowed on BS Freeview, and just reward for Karina's poetic abilities at the same time. The only other realistic way I could think of to get all-night porn onto Freeview would be for BS to hire in Brian Blessed as presenter, and have him bellowing "Hot girl caller - call now!!!" in Shakespearean cadence every night. I'm sure no one wants that (apart from Brian Blessed maybe?), so if anyone knows how to overthrow a Poet Laureate, I'm sure the forum would be grateful for their advice…
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