RE: The Chat Stays
I haven't watched the Chat since March 2009 when it was taken off Freeview. I can't legislate for what the content's like now or how/whether it's changed in the interim, but I always felt the basic principle was worth defending.
I really like the idea of a platonic babeshow - which was how I saw The Chat, even if it didn't seem to see itself that way. I love the night shows, but I don't like the way the interactive caller has little or no choice but to be directed down the route of phone sex. I understand why it's like that, obviously, but it seems at times that the interactive caller is little more than a pawn, there to be used for the benefit of eavesdroppers, who afterall, are the real 'royalty' on the night show phonelines - when it comes to the busy shows, at least. What I liked about The Chat was that interactive callers could talk about a very wide range of issues. Even though many of them did seem to head into fairly similar territory, it wasn't a condition of calling that they went there.
Commercially, The Chat must be much harder to make a success of than a night show. Sex or the lack of it is a factor, but the biggest flaw with The Chat I believe is that the interests of the interactive caller directly contradict the interests of the eavesdropper. On a night show, a natural eavesdropper is reasonably well catered for, and will at least expect the call to fulfil his wishes. The interactive caller wants to have phone sex, and the eavesdropper wants to listen to it. Even if someone's called to speak to a girl, sex chat will hold his attention until he does. Eavesdroppers facilitate the big revenue, so everything's cool. But with a show like The Chat, this isn't the case. The interactive caller might want to bullshit about his status, moan about his job or even make deluded attempts to arrange a date, but the eavesdropper expressly doesn't want to listen to him do it. That dramatically limits the earning potential of the show, and it's a fundamental problem which should have been addressed from the start.
I suppose there might be an option for The Chat to go the route of certain night shows and start choreographing calls to bring in listeners. Maybe instead of phone sex, The Chat could choreograph blazing rows. That might get a few eavesdroppers on the line if the acting was half reasonable and the price per min was sufficiently attractive... "Bambi (so she's still there then?) is having a hot blazing row with Ann - a 35-year-old prison officer whose boyfriend called the show last week! CALL NOW!!!"... I'm thinking that would probably only work once (if that), but then I thought that when the 'hot girl caller' thing started on the night shows, so what do I know? Some kind of private 'soap opera' on the phonelines of The Chat might bring in eavesdroppers, but it would need to be managed, 'leaked', and marketed cleverly. And even then, without the Freeview audience I imagine the uptake would be sluggish. Not forgetting of course that it would risk damaging the show's reputation with interactive callers. Mind you, there sometimes comes a point where not taking a risk is more of a risk than taking one. Introducing some strong incentives into the text service might also help, but really the whole formula of the show needs a major overhaul. Again, I haven't seen the show for ages, so I'm basing this on the way things were in early '09.
I'm glad The Chat has the chance to remedy its plight, because it does serve a niche which even the 'bikini shows' don't cover. But I totally agree that the formula (at least as it stood when I last saw the show) is doomed long term unless the obvious flaws are addressed. Essentially, if viewers aren't thinking: "What in the name of John Prescott's breakfast is going on here?!!", then someone needs to make sure they are.
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