RE: Jokes - HLO - 27-05-2020 20:21
I had to drive a 60 mile round trip to a castle
Why? I hear you ask
To test my eyesight
RE: Jokes - HLO - 27-05-2020 20:22
This gravity joke is getting a bit old, but I fall for it every time.
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 27-05-2020 20:44
Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed.
In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!"
The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same dream, too.
Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, "That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing!"
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 27-05-2020 20:46
A husband comes home to find his wife with her suitcases packed in the living room. "Where the hell do you think you're going?" he says.
"I'm going to Las Vegas. You can earn £400 for a blow job there, and I figured that I might as well earn money for what I do to you free."
The husband thinks for a moment, goes upstairs, and comes back down, with his suitcase packed as well. "Where do you think you going?" the wife asks.
"I'm coming with you...I want to see how you survive on £800 a year!!!"
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 27-05-2020 20:47
A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...."
The blonde replies, "Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 27-05-2020 20:49
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 27-05-2020 20:56
Why shouldn't you hire a midget chef?
The steaks are too high.
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 27-05-2020 21:14
Three Friends an Italian a German and a Greek they decided to bet it's other 100 euros who is going to make their wives scream more from sex.
So they all go home to have sex with their wives so they make them scream. The next day the meet.
The Italian says, "I made love to my wife for 2 hours and she was screaming for at least 1 1/2 hours."
The German says, "That's nothing, I start licking my wife for two hours and she was screaming the whole time and half hour after that."
The Greek says, " That's nothing, I made love to my wife for ten minutes, I came a couple times I wiped my Dick in the curtain and she still screaming."
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 30-05-2020 08:48
A 'Dominic Cummings ' is now a golfing term. It means a really long drive that goes out of bounds but there's no penalty.
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 30-05-2020 14:31
The nurse at the sperm bank asked me if I'd like to masturbate in the cup.
I said, "Well, I'm pretty good, but I don't think I'm ready to compete just yet."
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