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+---- Thread: Jokes (/showthread.php?tid=3004)
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RE: Jokes - HLO - 07-06-2020 15:58
A nice old lady on a bus offers the driver some peanuts.
He’s happy to take some. He asks her after a while why she isn’t having any herself.
“Oh, young man,” she says, “they’re too hard on my poor teeth, I couldn’t.”
“Why did you buy them at all then?” wonders the driver.
“You see, I just love the chocolate they’re covered in!
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 07-06-2020 16:20
Girl: “Hey, what’s up?”
Boy: “If I tell you, will you sit on it?”
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 07-06-2020 16:21
If a dove is the bird of peace, then is a swallow the bird of love?
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 07-06-2020 16:22
Why are Penises the lightest things in the world?
Even thoughts can raise them.
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 07-06-2020 16:23
I don’t think it’s possible for me to become a sniper.
Not by a long shot.
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 07-06-2020 16:24
As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field.
But hay, it’s in my jeans.
RE: Jokes - billyboy1963 - 07-06-2020 16:25
What’s a adult actress’ favorite drink?
7 Up in cider.
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 07-06-2020 17:18
Three guys had to spend the night at a hotel and share a double bed.
In the morning, the guy on the right said "I had this great dream last night, that a girl gave me a handjob"
The guy on the left replied "That's weird so did I"
Finally, the guy in the middle said "Lucky for you guys...I only dream't I was skiing"
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 07-06-2020 17:19
One afternoon a little girl excitedly approached her mother, and announced that she had learned where babies come from at school that day. Amused, her mother replied, "Really, sweetie? Why don't you tell me all about it?"
The little girl explained, "Well... OK... the mommy and daddy take off all of their clothes, and the daddy's thing sort of stands up, and the mommy puts it in her mouth, and then it sort of explodes, and that's where babies come from."
Her mom shook her head, leaned over to meet her eye to eye, and said, "Oh, honey, that's sweet, but that's not where babies come from. That's where jewelry comes from."
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 07-06-2020 17:20
A man and his son were talking about sex.
The son asked his father, "dad, what does a pussy look like?"
The dad asked him, "before or after sex?"
"Ummmm, before sex", the kid replied.
The dad said, "have you ever seen a beautiful red rose with soft red petals?"
"Yeah" said the son.
"Well, what about after sex?" said the son.
His dad replied, "have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonnaise"!!!