RE: Jokes - handsomeSOB - 30-06-2011 15:31
i heard that 5 out of 3 people can't do maths
RE: Jokes - handsomeSOB - 30-06-2011 15:36
i heard that if you put 20,000 pieces of paper end to end... you've got WAY too much time on your hands lol
RE: Jokes - handsomeSOB - 30-06-2011 15:41
if you go to the bakery and you wanna ring doughnut... they don't have a phone... or his number lol
RE: Jokes - handsomeSOB - 30-06-2011 15:48
i played table football the other day and i scored 147 goals!... although, it might've been a snooker table
i was sitting traffic the other day and... i got run over
RE: Jokes - handsomeSOB - 30-06-2011 16:04
50% of people, and that's almost half.... can't do percentages lol
what is sex with a photographer like?... over in a flash! lol
what does a rock get caught between? two hard places?
i spilled carpet cleaner, what should i do?!
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 30-06-2011 21:59
The wife suggested I got myself one of those penis enlargers. So I did.... She's 21 and her name is Lucy.
I went out with a girl who punched me in the face every time she had an orgasm. I didn't mind too much, until I found out she was faking them.
RE: Jokes - I-Love-U-Fernanda - 30-06-2011 23:01
Setanta has just won the rights to broadcast the World Oragami Championships...............unfortunately it's only available on paper view.
RE: Jokes - I-Love-U-Fernanda - 30-06-2011 23:51
Fart Football
An old man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying there a few minutes the old man farts and says "1-0".
His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?"
The old man replied, "It's fart football!"
A few minutes later the wife lets one go and says - "The equaliser 1-1"
After about five minutes the old man farts again and says - "Back in front 2-1".
Not to be out done the wife rips another one and says, - "What a Goal 2-2".
Five seconds go by and she lets out a squeaker and says - "Penalty kick 3-2 to me".
Now the pressures on and the old man refuses to get beat by a woman so he strains real hard but to no avail. Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable he gives it everything he has but instead of farting he shits the bed.
The wife looks and says, "What the hell was that?"
The old man replied, "Half-time, Switch sides!"
RE: Jokes - I-Love-U-Fernanda - 30-06-2011 23:53
Ryan Giggs wife has announced that she has left him, and taken half of everything. She now has 6 more Premier League medals than Steven Gerrard.
RE: Jokes - mr williams - 01-07-2011 07:02
A man says to his wife ” I fancy kinky sex, how about I come in your ear?"
The wife says: "no, I might go deaf!"
Man says:"well I’ve been coming in your mouth for 20 years & you're still talking!"
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