Timbo Wrote:Hasn't it been for the last ten years

firekind Wrote:cheryl tweedy is realistic i should think

mas0887 Wrote:3. Tell all of my ex's to fuck off and die because they are basically all cunts.

jungleboy Wrote:random...........game review i found hilarious


I've been playing this for two weeks, and hours and hours of my life now, so I'd like to respond in depth to the advertiser's claims about this game.

"Choose from a plethora of weapons", but because of our weird "primary, secondary, special" weapon classification system, you can only carry an assault rifle OR a sniper rifle, so kiss goodbye to any hope of actually utilising weapons in a tactical way in the single player game.

" Experience real freedom while roaming in more than 50km2 "; that's right, feel free to wander the African savannah, looking at rocks and trees. Some of the rocks will be bigger than the others. Some will be smaller. Some of the trees will be tall. Some will be short. Break up the monotony of your tour of African rocks and trees by either shooting mercenaries or... shooting mercenaries. And hey, if shooting mercenaries gets boring, well, we've always got more rocks and trees for you! If you're done with the story missions, play enthralling side missions - you get to shoot mercenaries! If you're lucky, there just might be some rocks and trees on the way...

" Discover Africa as if you were there thanks to amazing artistic research supported by next-gen technology to make it come to life!" Translation - discover Africa as though our programmers had had it described to them. Enjoy spending time in a coutry where everyone in the country arbitrarily wants you dead for no good reason. And finally, after years of waiting, there's finally a game where you can enjoy the thrill of malaria in your own home! That's pretty much every man's dream, having malaria.

" Fight for two rival factions" neither of whose policies you will be told about, neither of whom seem to represent any faction in particular, and neither of which you will care about, because we were so busy creating believable fire, we forgot to create a believable conflict. Are they fighting over food? Water? Disco music? You'll never find out, and you'll never care.

"choose your own path and make your way up to your primary target by any means necessary"; give up on any approach but 'shooting everything that's not me' after the first four seconds of the first gun fight.

"Feel free to explore this gigantic world and play over 70 side quests to earn help, new weapons and vehicles!" 70 side quests of remarkable similarity. Earn guns with the destructive power of a blowpipe attack from a child with asthma. Drive in vehicles that handle like a tortoise dying of depression.

"Next-gen technology brings a brand new experience to Far Cry 2. Be surprised by medics dragging wounded soldiers into a safe place. Read fear in grunts' eyes as your reputation and in-game actions make them want to drop their guns and run for cover." Translation - Next-gen technology brings you exactly the same experience as every FPS you've ever played, only with less going on.

To conclude:
Pros:
Malaria.

Cons:
You can only have a sniper rifle or an assault rifle, so tactical FPS options limited.
Enemies so effective at locating you, it's like they're using The Force, thus making stealth gameplay a joke.
More wandering from place to place than the Fellowship of The Ring.
Either the mercenaries are bulletproof or the gun shop only supplies rubber bullets.
Factions characterless and dull.
Missions repetitive and flavourless.
"Story" pretty non-existent.
Sidequests like main quests, only with no discernable rewards.

BelfastBadBoy Wrote:Far Cry 2 bored the balls of me,played it twice and never again