RE: Jokes - black knight - 02-11-2009 08:57
a man took his pet duck to the cinema.he was worried about not being admitted if someone saw it,so he stuck the bird down his trousers.in the theatre the duck starts to get uncomfortable,so the man opens his fly,so the bird can pop its head out.a woman sitting beside him says to her friend"this mans got his thing out"her friend replies"so,yuv seen one before havnt you?"
"yeah of course,but this ones eating my popcorn"
RE: Jokes - black knight - 02-11-2009 10:35
why did god create adam before he created eve?
because he didnt want anyone telling him how to make adam
RE: Jokes - black knight - 02-11-2009 11:54
an escaped convict breaks into a house and ties up the young couple who were sleeping in the bedroom.as soon as he,s got a chance the man turns to his sexy young wife and says"honey,this fella hasnt seen a woman in years,just cooperate with anything he wants.if he wants sex,pretend yur enjoying it.our lives depend on it"the wife spits out her gag and hisses back"im so glad you feel that way,cuz he told me he thinks you have a cute arse"
RE: Jokes - Summerz_180 - 02-11-2009 19:00
Sometimes I feel like facebook just likes to take the piss:
"56 of your friends were tagged in the album, 'Party of the Year'"
Yeah thanks for reminding me I'm unpopular.
RE: Jokes - Summerz_180 - 02-11-2009 19:03
Whenever I tell my girlfriend “I’m just going for a quick shit”, I always end up having the longest bowel movement ever.
Bet you can’t guess what happens when I tell her I’m going to fuck her all night.
RE: Jokes - Summerz_180 - 02-11-2009 19:05
Marriage counsellor to couple:
"Tell me something you both have in common."
Husband after long, awkward silence:
"Neither of us suck cock?"
RE: Jokes - Summerz_180 - 02-11-2009 22:01
An Essex girl and boy are playing hide and seek. The girl sends the boy a text. "If you find me, you can lick my pussy and fuck me up the arse, if you can't, I'm in the shed."
RE: Jokes - Summerz_180 - 02-11-2009 22:04
My wife insists on unplugging every electrical appliance in the house before having sex with me.
Its a massive turn off.
RE: Jokes - black knight - 03-11-2009 08:05
walking to work this morning,i passed a bloke in an rac van.he was sobbing his eyes out and was as miserable as sin.i thought to myself"that mans heading for a breakdown"
RE: Jokes - black knight - 03-11-2009 08:07
ikea are now selling lesbian beds,no need to screw,just tongue and groove
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