RE: Jokes - Tractor boy - 28-05-2018 16:55
So I told him, if you want to set up a company and run it yourself, that's your own business.
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 28-05-2018 17:29
Bought a dog called Curiosity.
I bought a cat today but didn’t have time to name her.
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 30-05-2018 09:29
When it's sunny I think 'Beer garden.' When it rains I usually go to the pub for a while. When it's snowing I like to sit in front of the TV with a case of Beer. I'm starting to think I have a problem with the weather.
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 02-06-2018 09:31
I remember my teacher telling me that looking out of the window wouldn’t get me anywhere.
Did I have a smug look on my face later on in life when I handed him his burger and fries at the drive through !
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 04-06-2018 09:54
I called work this morning and whispered, "Sorry boss, I can't come in today. I have a wee cough." He exclaimed, "You have a wee cough?" I said, "Really? Thanks boss, see you next week!"
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 08-06-2018 21:46
Picked up a hitchhiker last night. He said thanks how do you know I’m not a serial killer? I replied the chances of two serial killer’s being in the same car are astronomical.
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 09-06-2018 18:14
How to work out your twat name.
Take your first name and replace it with Piers.
Now take your surname and replace it with Morgan.
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 09-06-2018 18:15
I had a Bonnie Tyler Satnav, but it was terrible.
Just kept telling me to turn around, and every now and then it fell apart.
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 09-06-2018 18:17
Young lad in the bath with his Mum: 'What's that furry thing?'
Mum: 'That's my sponge son.'
Young lad: 'Oh yeah, the babysitter has one too, I've seen her washing Dad's face with it!'
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 09-06-2018 18:18
Stevie Wonder got a cheese grater for his birthday. He said it's the most violent book he's ever read.
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