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+---- Thread: Jokes (/showthread.php?tid=3004)
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RE: Jokes - Carl-Gen X - 06-02-2019 21:25
Gary Barlow's just blocked me on twitter, no idea why.
Whatever I said, whatever I did, I didn't mean it.
RE: Jokes - Carl-Gen X - 07-02-2019 22:28
My mate went to an industrial tribunal to claim for work related hearing loss.
Two months later and he still hasn't heard anything.
RE: Jokes - Carl-Gen X - 07-02-2019 22:29
Reading a book on the development of superglue. Can't put it down.
RE: Jokes - Carl-Gen X - 07-02-2019 22:30
My mate had an accident and his ear was ripped off.
The only thing the surgeons had to replace it with that was compatible was a pigs ear.
Saw him a few weeks after the operation and asked him how it was.
"It's ok," he said "but I get a bit of crackling now and then."
RE: Jokes - Carl-Gen X - 08-02-2019 20:44
What’s big and green and kills you if it falls out of a tree onto your head....
A snooker table..
*runs away*
RE: Jokes - Carl-Gen X - 08-02-2019 20:46
Three nuns are sitting on a park bench
A man comes up and exposes himself to them
Two of them have a stroke...but the third one couldn’t reach!
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 08-02-2019 21:15
I was talking to my milkman the other day who told me he has had sex with every woman on his route bar 1! I asked my wife about it and she said “I bet it’s that bitch at number 32!”
RE: Jokes - Cheesy Grin - 08-02-2019 21:16
A woman brings 10-year-old Johnny home after he was caught playing doctor with her 10-year-old daughter. Johnny's mum says "Let's not be too harsh on them, they are bound to be curious about sex?" "Curious about sex?" She replies "He's taken her fucking appendix out!"
RE: Jokes - Carl-Gen X - 09-02-2019 12:11
Just hired an Eastern European cleaner. She took 5 hours to hoover the house.
Turns out she was a Slovak.
RE: Jokes - Carl-Gen X - 09-02-2019 12:14
Two nuns riding a tandem bike down a bumpy road.
One turns round to the other and says “oh I’ve never come this way before”
“Must be the cobbles” says the other nun.