Jokes

A man boards a bus with six kids.

When they are all settled in their seats, an old lady across leans towards the man and asks, ‘‘are they all your kids?’’

The man replied, ‘‘I work for a condom production company and these here are customer complaints.’’

A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for books about paranoia.

She whispers, "They're right behind you!"

What should you do if you're attacked by a group of clowns?

Go straight for the juggler.

A cement mixer and a prison bus crashed on the highway.

Police advise citizens to look out for a group of hardened criminals.

Which rock group has four guys who can't sing or play instruments?

Mount Rushmore.

Just been on a weekend residential course about reincarnation, very interesting.
Mind you, it cost nearly £800, still, you only live once.

My boss calls me "the computer".

Nothing to do with intelligence, I go to sleep if left unattended for 15 minutes.

What is the difference between a Genealogist and a Gynecologist?

A Genealogist looks up your family tree, whereas a Gynecologist looks up your family bush.