Room 101

False tits
diving footballers
my ex wife
her mum
and the prick who thought it best that Anna should leave (but i would shoot that bastard first).

That Redheaded T-w-a-t from the end of Ghostbusters.

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WARNING: May contain nuts
THE MASTER OF HIS DOMAIN

Just thought of another - The colour pink.

Eurgh, just typing in that colour turned my lower intestine inside-out! I'll never understand why women can't seem to grow out of the "Ooh, pink, so cute!" phase. How many men do you see raving about blue, driving blue cars and wearing blue clothes? I'll tell how many - none, that's how many! Wanna know what The Master's favourite colour is? Red - blood red!

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Kicking ass and taking names
THE MASTER OF HIS DOMAIN

Non stop adverts for ''katie and peter stateside'' on ITV2
Does my head in!
Who the fuck watches that shit?

1.) Wilfilly stupid people. Not people who aren't intellectually blessed, but people who have enough to intelligence to know better, yet never make the effort.

2.) Piers Morgan.

3.) Clowns.

4.) Wasps.

5.) Cilla black.

6.) Spiders that charge at me like an eight-leggity Mike Tyson, when I'm trying to crush them with a slipper.

7.) Tomato stalks, for making me think they're spiders.

8.) People who stop suddenly on staircases.

9.) Women who glare at me like I'm some kind of pervert when I'm trying to read the writing on their t-shirts. You don't want me to read your tits? DON'T PUT BLOODY WRITING ON THEM, THEN!!!

10.) 1100cc engined hatchbacks that have had the exhaust tweaked so that it sounds like a Harrier jet taking off, despite the fact the slack-jawed chav inside it was too damned cheap to do anything to the engine.

11.) Banks.

12.) Jeremy Kyle.

13.) People who go on Jeremy Kyle.

14.) People who watch Jeremy Kyle.

15.) Jeremy Kyle.

16.) People who don't know how to argue properly. You make a point, I dispute that point, you point out any errors in my rebuttal, I do the same to you etc. Repeating your original point ONLY LOUDER does not count, damn you!

17.) Bus drivers who brake sharply, sending you sprawling down the gangway with your shopping making a mad dash for freedom in all directions.

18.) The fact that Metro Station & Good Charlotte are somehow regarded as rock bands. They aren't rock bands, they're boy bands wearing dark clothes!

19.) The word "Edited", because I always stumble on it and add an extra syllable, making me sound like half-wit.

20.) Films that claim to have a scientific basis, but don't have even a nodding aquaintence with actual science. Any disaster film on Sci-Fi Channel or Movies 24 is a perfect case in point.

I'll stop now, before you all start thinking I'm a raging psychopath or something...

Fuck that Mr G is a raging psychopath

Heyup Mr Gummidge, read your list, no zombies? Your plan to deal with them must be pretty watertight if you've chosen not to take the opportunity to put them in room 101.

Jesus, haven't read your post yet Mr G, but a quick glance tells me you're one angry bloke!!

I hope one of the items on your list isn't people who reply to a post before having read it....

Colbert Rules Wrote:Garth Crooks...it's personal.

Total dickhead, back in the early 90's i had dinner with him(company do) prick was so up himself, i came close too sticking my fork in his eye..............but i needed the job





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oopnorth Wrote:Heyup Mr Gummidge, read your list, no zombies? Your plan to deal with them must be pretty watertight if you've chosen not to take the opportunity to put them in room 101.

I've got them covered. All I need now is the trebuchet I ordered from ebay and the neighbours permision to demolish their houses to give me a 360 degree field of fire...