Favourite TV & Film Quotes & Dialogue

Stimpy: Hey, Ren, this horse reminds me of your Uncle Eddie.
Ren: Why is that?
Stimpy: Because he's big and stinky.
Ren: Hey, you shouldn't say mean things like that! Didn't you ever consider that this horse might have feelings?

I might as well post the entire Anchorman script, but I'll choose my favourite part:

Brian Fantana: Sex Panther by Odeon. This stuff is illegal in 9 countries. It's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.
Ron Burgundy: It's quite pungent. [cringes] It's a formidable scent; it stings the nostrils, in a good way.
Brian Fantana: [daubing the cologne on his neck] Yup.
Ron Burgundy: Brian, I'm gonna be honest with you, that smells like pure gasoline.
Brian Fantana: They've done studies, you know. They say 60% of the time, it works every time.
Ron Burgundy: That doesn't make any sense.

From "The Big Bang Theory"

Raj: "What we need is some kind of social lubricant"

Leonard: "Well we can't get a room of 15 year old girls drunk".

Howard: "Or could we?"

Leonard: "No - we couldn't!!"

Howard: "I think you mean we shouldn't"

The Big Lebowski: What makes a man, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude: Dude.
The Big Lebowski: Huh?
The Dude: Uhh... I don't know sir.
The Big Lebowski: Is it being prepared to do the right thing, whatever the cost? Isn't that what makes a man?
The Dude: Hmmm... Sure, that and a pair of testicles

Entourage:

Lloyd (Ari's homosexual assistant): What’s wrong?
Ari: Has so much cum squirted in those eyes you can’t see what’s right in front of your face? Amanda Daniels takes that job, Vince is fucked and I’m fucked. Which means we’re all fucked. And we’re fucked in the way you like to get fucked not fucked in the way normal people like to get fucked.

From "Ghostbusters"

"Ray, the next time anyone asks you if you're a God, you say...YES !!"

Groucho Marx as Rufus T. Firefly in the 1933 film "Duck Soup"
Will you marry me? Did he leave you any money? Answer the second question first.

More Entourage, and more gems from Ari Gold:

Therapist: Don’t you feel that a lacking sexual relationship is a big problem in a marriage?
Ari: Oh, I do doc. But we fuck more than any other married couple you know. And I know this because whenever we go out with another married couple and the subject comes up, they always say, you know, I can’t believe how often you guys fuck.

Ari: Fuck the phones Lloyd! Unless Carmen Electra calls for an emergency tittie fuck, DON’T ANSWER!

Ari: People, staff meeting has been cancelled. You all have one goal today: to get Vincent Chase’s brother, Johnny Chase, a job. Any job! I don’t care if it’s a porn shoot in which he is being gang raped by a gaggle of silverback apes, if there are cameras rolling, everybody wins.

Lizzy: You got the [NFL] meeting? Shit that’s impressive.
Ari: Yeah, I’d blow myself if I was more flexible.

I Have Something To Say Its Better To Burn Out Then To Fade Away: kurgan (highlander)

Homer Simpson: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.