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Jokes

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billyboy1963 Offline
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Post: #9531
RE: Jokes
I just read a book titled “How to Survive Falling Down a Staircase”.


It’s a step by step guide.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ars longa, vita brevis

Cogito ergo sum

Fere libenter homines id quod volunt credunt
10-11-2019 15:03
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i'llbeback123 Offline
Hasta la vista, baby!
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Post: #9532
RE: Jokes
If you’re waiting to be served in a restaurant, shouldn’t you be called the waiter?

Interesting, isn’t it, that "take out" refers to food, romantic dating, and assassination.

I was hoping to steal some leftovers from the party but I guess my plans were foiled.

That awkward moment when your friend told you their dog died, and, without thinking, you say, “Oh no, that must have been ruff…”

MK11 aka Mortal Kombat 11 - Spawn (DLC) vs Shao Kahn intro:
Spawn: Imagine Outworld free of slaves.
Shao Kahn: Over my dead body.
Spawn: Today's the day, skull-fucker.
12-11-2019 22:20
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Cheesy Grin Offline
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Post: #9533
RE: Jokes
13-11-2019 12:14
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Tractor boy Offline
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Post: #9534
RE: Jokes
Why are asteroids called asteroids and haemorrhoids called haemorrhoids ?

Surely it should be the other way around ?
13-11-2019 22:51
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Cheesy Grin Offline
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Post: #9535
RE: Jokes
[Image: 74717096-1298781343658793-8413828580538056704-n.jpg]
15-11-2019 12:45
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Carl-Gen X Offline
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Post: #9536
RE: Jokes
Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the Nobel Peace Prize.

He was outstanding in his field..

(I’ll get my coat)
16-11-2019 22:59
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Carl-Gen X Offline
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Post: #9537
RE: Jokes
My Dad always told me to fight fire with fire, which is probably why he got thrown out of the fire brigade.
16-11-2019 23:00
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Cheesy Grin Offline
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Post: #9538
RE: Jokes
My girlfriend says I’m tight!

So to prove her wrong we went out for some tea and biscuits

It was quite exciting as she’s never given blood before
18-11-2019 10:46
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Carl-Gen X Offline
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Post: #9539
RE: Jokes
I missed the bus this morning...

I really shouldn’t be so sentimental about public transport..
18-11-2019 12:41
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Carl-Gen X Offline
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Post: #9540
RE: Jokes
R.I.P boiled water

You will be mist.
18-11-2019 12:43
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