Jokes

Four thugs are outside beating up my mother-in-law. The Wife asks, "Aren't you going to help?"
I replied, "Nope, four should be enough"

We got a new car for the mother-in-law. that Government scrappage scheme is great.

I asked my Grandmother for something Cuban for by birthday,she got me a Che Guevara T-Shirt.Clothes but no cigar.

i'd thought i'd tell you a little bit about myself, i'm quite a private person.... that's it, really lol

I got the mother-in-law a chair, but I'm not allowed to plug it in.

Whats the punnishment for bigamy?
Two mother-in-laws.

What do you do if you come across a tiger in the jungle ? Wipe it off & apologize.

Heard the one about the conman up in court?
He gave the judge five years hard labour!!

I organized a 3-some last night...There were a couple of no-shows,but I still had a good time.

Just quit my job at the helium factory no-one speaks to me in that tone

i've got a joke about ironing badly that will have you in creases!

i saw a girl with a dvd in her mouth, i said, "what are you doing?" she said, "i'm trying to get into the porn business" i said, "no, you need to learn how to suck DICKS not DISCS!"

have i said my dá ja vu joke?

it must be cool... to be a fridge! lol

i'd hate to be certain foods, with them, it's out of the freezer, into the frying pan... i hope it doesn't get worse from that point!... what?... fire?! oh... it DOES get worse! lol