Worst & Best Chat up Lines

i'm telling you now, it's your place, the wife and kids are at mine

"Is it cold out or are you just smuggling tic-tacs."

Get your coat love, it's cold in the back of my van.

"I wish you were a door so i could bang you all day long."

"Do you want to play army? I will lay down and you can blow the hell outta me."

Hi, I’m Mr Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

oi! you! fuck me!

"If you were a lolly, i'd be licking you all night."

"You may not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away"

Whats your favourite colour/flavour condom?
You're in luck I have one of those in my wallet.

I may not be the best looking bloke here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

I'm going to call you 'spanner' , cause whenever I see you my nuts go tight.

"Is your name Gillette? because you're certainly the best a man can get."

"Do you work for the postal service? I could have sworn i saw you checking out my package."

"Is that a keg in your pants? Cos i'd love to tap that arse!"

"Nice legs - what time do they open?"